INVISIBLE OIL SLICKS!!! BRILLIANT!!!
No doubt about it. This was one wild race at Watkins Glen, but for unusual reasons.
Tony Stewart spins out. Dale Jr. spins out. Jeff Gordon spins out. It's down to Kyle Busch, Brad Keselowski, and Marcos Ambrose on the last lap. Kyle starts losing traction and Brad gives him a little nudge. GOODBYE KYLE!!! Then Brad starts losing traction and Marcos gives him a push. Then Marcos wins after some down and dirty racing: Driving off-road like this is Gran Turismo, then Marcos nearly pins Brad into the wall on that last turn, if you caught it (vote to kick Marcos from the Forza server!!!).
There must've been oil on the track, presumably from Joe Nemechek as he DNF'ed his way off the track. No flags though! They've stopped races for stupid things like beer bottles and plastic bags on the track but oil they couldn't see? RACE IS ON!!! Time to compete with vidya games like Super Sprint, deal with the obstacles!!! BTW, do these guys have traction control on? To avoid spin-outs? No, cause driving aids are for the dreaded, offensive c-word...CASUALS.
Anyway, when it comes to circuit racing, always bet on the foreigners. Except for Juan Pablo who sucks. Now I have a legitimate excuse to play this song so BLOODY GOOD JOB, MATE!!! Marcos the Aussie.
And now Junior is in 4th in the points. DAMN!!! This is not good, we don't need another Jimmy Johns championship, GTFO (ha, jk, Jimmy is a class act).
BTW, I would like to congratulate all of the following drivers for losing their jobs and having their driver's licenses revoked. Here are the drivers:
Jeff Burton
Kurt Busch
Joey Logan
Juan Pablo Montoya
Denny Hamlin
Jason Leffler
Dave Blaney
Michael McDowell
Josh Wise
Jamie McMurray
J.J. Yeley
Chris Cook
Patrick Long
Brian Vickers
Why? For placing worse than Joe "My Car DNF'ed After 3 Laps" Nemechek. Losing to Joe is like losing to Glass Joe, it's OVER for you.
BTW, you saw what happened yesterday? To Sega All-Stars Racing Spokeswoman Danica Patrick? FIRST TURN OF THE RACE, she gets taken out. Apparently, Ryan Truex, the genius, decided to cut on the inside of the first turn and hope to bounce off the other cars Gran Turismo-style (real driving simulator, my ass). And guess who just happened to be behind Ryan Truex at the time? Danica. DOINK!!! She finished 43th place--dead last. No matter whose fault it is, the fact is Danica has this rain cloud following her wherever she goes and it's a given she'll find a stupid way to set herself back.
Before the Nationwide November race at Texas, when Danica drives the Sonic & Sega All-Stars Car, we're having a prayer vigil. Sega + NASCAR should be a slam dunk win (Daytona USA) but that's not the case with Danica. Lest you forget that Danica has won only one serious race in her career (2008 Indy Car race at Twin Ring Motegi) so we must truly pray that Danica does not fudge this up and that Sega is able to win again. Cause Lord knows Sega needs every advantage it can get.
That was one heck of a finish. Just to add Skyscraper Sequence playing in the background and it'd be perfect.
ReplyDeleteKinda feel bad for Danica. Aside from the criticism from her inclusion in ASRT of people not knowing who she was and out of place it seemed, the people that did mentioned that she, like you put it, has that rain cloud following her.
Yes, Danica's skills may be questionable, but she's had back luck lately. I'm indifferent to her but since she's part of the Sega organization now, we need her to win.
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