Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Oh No, We Suck Again! (Japan/Nintendo)

Following my post on how Keiji Inafune said Japanese games suck, we get another wonderful followup along the lines of OHWAITYOUFORGOTABOUTTHISYOUDONTKNOWWHATYOURETALKINGABOUT, in other words, Nintendo.  I had a lot of time to mull this...:

http://kotaku.com/5643582/hey-nintendo-is-a-japanese-company-you-know

...BUT WAIT!  Inafune did address Nintendo briefly in this article and gave them some props, so it's not like he's a ignoramus:

http://tgs.gamespot.com/story/6276630/japanese-game-makers-five-years-behind-inafune

But I kind of see what he was saying about the Big N...so here goes:

DISCLAIMER: I'm about to get on Nintendo's case here.  I DO NOT HATE NINTENDO.  I AM NOT A FANBOY.  I'M JUST CALLING IT LIKE I SEE IT.

Nintendo doesn't appear at TGS.  They appear at E3, they go "big."  They're responsible for making games like Zelda, Mario, and Pokemon which are gaming icons.  That's great.

Nowadays, I think Nintendo has been underwhelming.  First of all, console sales.  Wii sold about 70 mil, DS sold 140 mil.  THAT'S A LOT.  But other than all those sales, what does Nintendo have?  Motion controls?  Sad to say it, but Xbox 360 is quickly usurping the Wii as the most robust console of this generation.  Xbox 360 costs more money, but it's very versatile--DVD player, Xbox Live Arcade, Hi-Def screen, etc.  Nintendo Wii has the overstayed motion controls and lame friend codes.  Ask anyone who's played SSB: Brawl online how those are working out.  Besides, who wants to play Brawl with ACTUAL motion controls anyway?  People pissed and moaned about playing Mario Kart Wii with the "Wii-Wheel" so they resorted to using the joypad.

And then Nintendo seems to sparsely release blockbuster games--yeah we just got Super Mario Galaxy 2, but we haven't gotten another console Zelda and it's all about random stuff like "Super Mario Vore Adventure Inside Bowser," or "Samus Wanders Around Another Planet Again," and you know.  And another thing, throw out Nintendo first/second party games and they really don't have much except for the motion control gimmick which MS and Sony are slowly catching up on.

Hmm, this is interesting!  As a matter of fact on this very day, a GameFAQs poll that asks "Which console has the best game library?" further proves my point...  Xbox 360 - 37%  PS3 - 26%  ,  DS - 13%  ,  Wii - 5%  ...

And for that reason despite massive console unit sales, you see Wii's collecting dust and 360's running overtime, only to RRoD apparently (lol).  Seriously, if it weren't for the RRoD's, the 360 would be the runaway best console but that holds it back--lousy Microsoft with their 50% RRoD rate...  The PS3 is picking up steam late now that its price is going down and its game library increases.  Arguably the best graphics of this generation.  Seriously, forget about games, the PS3 has a Blu-ray player which is becoming increasingly popular...

In other words, the way I see it, Nintendo seems perfectly content putting the car on cruise control cause they are freakin' Nintendo, nothing bad will ever come of them and everyone will love them.  I also don't think being on their own console is helpful cause frankly, it leaves the 360 and the PS3 as cesspools where Japanese devs get little support from each other.  IN MY OPINION, GUYS.


EDIT: Guess what I'm trying to say is that Nintendo needs to drum up more third-party support...

REPEAT DISCLAIMER: I'm got on Nintendo's case here.  I DO NOT HATE NINTENDO.  I AM NOT A FANBOY.  I'M JUST CALLING IT LIKE I SEE IT.

And then like we said before, Sega and all the cohorts suck too.  Of course, the only thing I don't really get about what Inafune said is that Japan is "five years behind."  I think I touched on that before.  Basically, they're behind on graphics (the Wii) or clever ideas?  Clever ideas....?

This cuts into my next point.  This will probably tick off someone.  Look, I'm a patriotic American, I love my country, God Bless America.  But if it weren't for Japanese game developers, gaming would be a train wreck of catastrophic proportions.  You like Halo?  You like God of War?  You like freakin Burnout?  Well, congratulations, then every single game will be like that.  EVERY GOSH-DANG GAME WILL TAKE PLACE IN SPACE/THE FUTURE (or in the "classical past" like Assassin's Creed or Prince of Persia though they will inexplicably inject some sci-fi elements in there anyway).  Violence and crap movie adaptations galore.  People will worship at the altar of World of Warcraft and sacrifice their time in honor.  Burnout and Fast and the Furious-esque racing games up your ass (Oh Dear God)!  Oh, and you'd get business dudes like this calling the shots:


You know what, this is all theoretical.  It may not turn out that way if Japan bows out.  But don't say that it CAN'T happen.

So, what can be "done" about it?  Nothing really.  I mean, being "five years behind" doesn't really mean anything to me.  It's about selling games that are popular.  And maybe with the exception of a few sparse Japanese games, they're a rare breed in the game market.  You can't "force" someone to like something.  This whole game mentality we have today may not change.  We may be screwed already as far as we know.

And to make this come full circle, look at Sega.  Daytona USA.  We've got to break down the proverbial wall and freakin salvage whatever we can before the world blows up in our face.  Ok, so I'm a crazy lunatic.  I'm out of things to say.  I give Inafune some props for saying what he did.  I'm not exactly smiling on the future either.  Goodbye.

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