Monday, September 20, 2010

Don't Get All Emo On Me

NOTE: I changed some stuff in this article to clear up any stupid things I might have said.

There's a song that I really like that often provokes emotions in me and that is Tuesday's Gone by Lynyrd Skynyrd:



Train roll on, on down the line,
Won't you please take me far away?
Now I feel the wind blow outside my door,
Means I'm leaving my woman behind.
Tuesday's gone with the wind.
My woman's gone with the wind.


And I don't know where I'm going.
I just want to be left alone.
Well, when this train ends I'll try again,
But I'm leaving my woman at home.


Tuesday's gone with the wind.
Tuesday's gone with the wind.
Tuesday's gone with the wind.
My woman's gone with the wind.


Train roll on many miles from my home,
See, I'm riding my blues away.
Tuesday, you see, she had to be free
But somehow I've got to carry on.


Tuesday's gone with the wind.
Tuesday's gone with the wind.
Tuesday's gone with the wind.
My woman's gone with the wind.

And I was looking on SongMeanings.net and I got a good idea of what the song's about:

I think this song means he's leaving the love of his life, but not because he stopped loving her. It sounds to me like he's leaving her BECAUSE he loves her. Maybe he knew that he couldn't treat her the way she deserved and she wasn't as happy as she could be. ANd he loves her so much that instead of being with her...he just wants her to be happy. And then he wants to just get away...he still loves her and he wants to be with her...and its painful because he knows that she won't be happy until he's gone from her life. The line "Tuesday, you see, she had to be free" I think helps reinforce my point. He just wanted her to be free, he didn't want her to feel trapped with him...he wants her to be happy. Amazing song, every time I hear it I get weird feelings because there is this girl I am really in love with... I want to be with her so bad...but I don't think I'm right for her...as badly as I want to be with her, I just want her to be happy, whether thats with me or another guy. Which is strange, I always made fun of movies that said corny lines like that...but I actually understand it now.

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Now, what does this mean?  I'm not talking about a woman, I'm talking about...get ready for it...Daytona USA 2.  Yes, I miss that game that much.  Haven't been able to play it in God knows how long (about five years).  And I've already treated on the level of a human being, I miss it, it's gone, I cry.  It's sick.  I KNOW THAT.  But that's how I feel.  NOTE: I'm not saying that I'm romantically attracted to the game, I'm not about to marry it...geez.  Also, I know that the song meaning doesn't 100% apply to the situation (we're talking about a game here) but close enough, makes me feel sad.  I just picked the worst possible game to be a fan of and I think that having played this game, I think my life is worse off than it was before.
 
It's not about just getting the game, it's about doing it justice, and my plan has always been to get a computer science bachelor's degree (which I'm 13 hours/credits away from), going to an undergraduate video game school like Full Sail, then trying to end up in Sega of Japan's offices where I get down on my knees and plead Yu Suzuki and Toshihiro Nagoshi to make another Daytona game.
 
And I know, the idea is so ludicrous but that's all I can do.  I can't imagine myself working for these other video game companies that I don't agree with.  What's gotten worse is that over the years, I've just been sulking over Sega's decisions.  I'm not going to lie--I'm a crappy Sega fan.  I like what Sega's done mostly in the Dreamcast era and with their lineup of quirky, non-violent titles, but it's practically the racing games that get me.  I mean, we've got a few good things like After Burner Climax, LA Machine Guns, Phantasy Star, Radiant Silvergun, etc. NOTE: I am very happy for the fans though and that's what matters.  But personally, it just wasn't doing it for me.

And if I do somehow get employed by Sega, I just don't see myself getting a shot at a Daytona game.  I'll probably work on these weird games that I have little interest in and I just won't like it.  NOTE: This is espeiclaly because Sega's changed so much in the last couple of years.  If I got to work during the Dreamcast era, it would probably be drastically different.  That's how the video game industry works nowadays--one person, especially me with no experience, can't fight the current.  Although I do hope that no matter what happens, that Sega can at least return to their glory days and produce good, clean titles that make everyone happy.  If I can at least do my part, I would be content.
 
To think that I could possibly be more successful working for some other company besides Sega so basically, I'm making a risky choice by choosing to pursue my goals.  I mean, I can code, I can model, I can make maps in FPS games, but I have a feeling that going to Sega will hinder my progress.  Of course, this is all assuming I have the willpower to complete my video game training, travel to Japan, and somehow get hired by Sega in the first place.  NOTE: Oh, and learn Japanese.  And not to mention that I've completely forgot about earning money, finding a home, being comfortable, etc.
 
And about the song, well, Daytona USA 2 is gone like the wind...haven't played it in years.  But really, how far can I take this?  I mean, is it really worth bringing the game back?  It's just this little arcade game with three cars and tracks that frankly, very few people seem to like.  What am I doing?  Should I just let the game rest in peace and go out with whatever honor it may have?  Or should I take the chance of ruining my career and/or bastardizing the Daytona name (or whatever alternate title we give the game due to licensing and all) just for this little game?  Can I ever just let go and move on to other things...?

Like I've said before, there's just something in Sega racers, particularly Daytona 2, which just makes me tick...like they're just magic.  I can't let go.  No other racing games have been so satisfying.  Even if I don't play these games often, I still love to see them and reminisce on good feelings.
 
Tuesday's gone with the wind...oh geez, I just don't know what to do.  Really, assuming that society continues to function like normal over the next few years, I have a shot at it and I believe that I can succeed, but I'm really going to bite the bullet here.  I just don't know what's going to come of the future.  It's in the Lord's hands.
 
Ok, everyone who read this probably thinks I'm crazy, but I'm a dreamer.  Everyone has dreams.  I'm not that good at video games, I'm not that smart (I blew my good GPA last semester), I have no physical talents, I'm not even that charismatic.  But regardless of what gets in your way, you have to go for it.  I mean, that's why I do ludicrous stuff like post on this blog, make Forza 3 designs, beg GameFAQs for message boards, etc...

Wow, they don't make music like that anymore.  Goodbye, I'll get back to you on more Sonic Adventure stuff later...

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